Get serious
Author’s note: Sorry for the extended break. Some of you pay good money for this newsletter, which I’m grateful for beyond words. I could claim “busyness” or “#life”, but truth is I got a bit off the writing wagon.
At any rate, this is the first post in a number that are scheduled in advance, so I’ve hopefully righted the ship a bit. There’s also some news coming your way, along with a freebie for paid subscribers, so stay tuned!
The true Christian concept of “repentance” gets overlooked a lot, even by Christians. The root word is a Greek one - the language of the New Testament - metanoiew. The “w” in that transliteration stands in for the Greek letter omega, so the word sounds something like “meta-noy-eh-oh.”
Anyways, the word speaks literally of changing your mind. In Christian theology, it refers to changing your mind about sin. When I repent of my sin, I’m acknowledging a past way of thinking - “stealing is OK!” - and changing my mind to a new paradigm; “stealing is BAD, because God says so.”
In other words, “saying sorry” doesn’t really cut it. Sure, sorrow is involved in true repentance, but it’s the sorrow over the consequences of that past course of action. I’m sorry that my sin caused grief, to my God and to myself. I’m sorry that the consequences of that sin is death, according to God’s Word. I’m sorry that stealing put me in jail, etc.
You get the idea. Moving beyond the theological, I think men everywhere should embrace this concept a bit more.
Change your mind
In short, we should probably repent - i.e., change our minds - more.
Got a habit or pattern of life that’s clearly holding you back? Change your mind about it.
I’m not talking just of “bad” things here. Clearly, if you have an addiction problem, that’s holding you back and you can and should change it. Get help if you need it; whatever it takes to shift that mindset.
But I’m talking more about the less-obvious things here. I think this message goes against the grain of today’s culture. Actually, I know it. Implicit in the “be true to yourself” message is the idea that you certainly shouldn’t change your mind, especially about yourself. “Know yourself” is a journey of discovery, not change.
Now, it’s true that the general concept of change, even radical change, is radically popular today. At least in certain ways.
Let’s take the most obvious expression of this: the trans rights movement. At its heart, the idea is simple: if your journey of self-discovery requires that you make radical physical changes, then go for it! Simple biology is no match for inner truth.
This is less of a “change your mind,” and more “change your body to match your mind.”
And it certainly doesn’t evaluate your current state and impose changes externally.
The process of repentance
That raises a crucial point. Changing your mind in the style of repentance - let’s call it practical repentance - begins with external criteria.
A Christian knows that sin is sin, not necessarily because of internal knowledge* but because of external truth. God says that x is sin, therefore, I must change my activities, my very mindset, based on that truth.
Because I’m not diving deeply into the theology here, I’ll just note in passing - this is the gospel message of Christianity. A, you are a sinner. B, that sin brings consequences (death). C, there’s a way to avoid those consequences (salvation), through the work of Christ. But D, that requires (or results in) repentance; changing your mind about sin and striving to change your entire lifestyle in consequence of that.
I’ll leave the gospel message aside for now, but do want to highlight that repentance, spiritually-speaking, is among the most profound concepts in Christianity.
What I’m arguing for here is a narrow application of a broader Christian concept.
The Process of Practical Repentance
Let’s break down what this could look like in real life.
Embrace External Truth
Relatively rarely do we come to a point of “self-realisation,” where we say hey, this is clearly an area of weakness, and I’ve suddenly achieved the necessary motivation to change.
That’s…. uncommon. Blind spots are blind spots for a reason. Often, we don’t know what changes we need to make until something or someone intervenes.
When we get that input, that external truth, the tendency is to reject, not receive. But, and this is critical, if you can cultivate an attitude that receives criticism and doesn’t automatically reject it, you might be able to move to the next step.
Apply Personal Evaluation
Not all criticism, and not all suggested changes, are serious. Serious criticism needs to be evaluated and considered, then applied.
A word of hope here; the odds are good that you’ll know instinctively whether criticism is serious or frivolous. The easiest way to determine that is to look at the source. Does your external truth come from a serious person? Or someone with a track record of being unserious and unreliable?
To use a real-world example; the Bible, or Reddit?
Activate Change
Ok, so you’ve received some external truth, applied it to yourself, and determined an area(s) that need to be changed.
Now’s where you need to get serious.
Because that’s the other aspect of repentance that I haven’t mentioned. Repentance is serious stuff. It’s serious not because of the changes you’ll need to make, but because of what’s at stake. Repentance, in the Christian paradigm, is changing your mind about the single most important element of life itself: your relationship to God.
Applied to lesser matters, the same undercurrent of seriousness should remain.
Want to shift your sleeping patterns? Get serious - this could make or break your productivity.
Ready to cut down on video games, or your excess eating, or your ice-cream-before-bed habit? Get serious! You’re changing your mind about something that’s going to have a huge impact on your life.
The corollary to “get serious” is “grow up;” I won’t dive into that one here, but just a brief look around at the world shows precious little of either seriousness or adulthood.
Don’t let that be you. I’m not letting it be me.
Embrace repentance, and get serious.
Action Points
Get serious input into your life. Honestly, this can be as easy as finding some reliable voices to follow online - although that’s always risky. A better idea is to cultivate serious friendships.
Be teachable. I’ve pulled heavily from the Christian concept of repentance for this post, but there’s a key difference. I’m from the reformed tradition, which teaches that we cannot really condition ourselves to repent. God has to prepare us to even be able to change our minds about sin - we’ll never do it on our own.
Thankfully, you can teach yourself to be teachable. Hearing what others say about you, particularly negative things, and actually being willing to consider those things on the merits, is a rare skill. Learn it.
*I’m purposefully overlooking the idea of conscience here. Yes, we do have a conscience, and yes, that conscience functions as a moral guide. But contrary to Jiminy Crickett, it’s hardly an infallible one.